Outside my window.............the sun is rising very slowly today.  There is a chill in the air that is welcome after the past few weeks of heat and high humidity.  It seems to have rained and very hard last night.  Make a note to check the rain guage to see how much we got.  We racked up over four inches last week.

I am thinking..........that I should be showering or doing some such other useful thing but not quiet yet.  Being alone here in my room is a pleasant feeling.

I am thankful for........my lovely daughter and her companionship this past weekend.

From the schoolroom...........all is in readiness for the start of a new school week. 

From the kitchen...........I have been thinking about making a pot of pasta e fagioli for tonights supper.  It is cool out and that always puts me in mind to make soup for some reason.  Maybe I can scare up enough bread flour to make a loaf of bread too.

I am wearing...........grey shorts and grey tee shirt.  I haven't even contemplated the days attire yet

I am creating............nothing at present.  Although that should change tomorrow after I pick up my newly repaired sewing machine.

I am going...........to morning Mass and then nowhere else I hope.  I would like to stay home all day long and just enjoy the pleasure of being here.

I am reading............Chosen and Cherished by Kimberly Hahn

I am hoping............that today is a sunny day and that it is boring and predictable.  Wouldn't that be nice.

I am hearing........the sounds of Matthew taking a shower and Doug making his lunch to take to work.

Around the house..........the usual mess leftover from the weekend's neglect.

One of my favorite things...........waking up in the morning and knowing that my family is all around me and safe.

A few plans for the rest of the week..........the usual rounds of mass and holy hours.  I have to make phone calls today to get Jason a follow-up appointment with his surgeon and MK an appointment for an untrasound.  Thursday I have a teacher's meeting at church that I musn't forget.  Then it will be Friday again and I can go get MK for another weekend at home.

Here is a picture thought that I am sharing with you ............

I miss you MK but remember that you are doing your job and that God is happy with you.

I don't know of a person who enjoys waiting.  Sitting in a waiting room at the dr's office or at the airport or train station seems to take up a great deal of my time lately.  I should think that it would be the vehicle for teaching me a great deal of patience.  Unfortunately it hasn't done that, quite the converse has happened.  All the waiting that I have ever done has only made me more impatient.  Impatient with other people, the other inhavitants of the human race.  I could write a book about all that I have seen and heard in waiting rooms.  The complaints of people who know what they are going to experience while they are waiting.  Let's face it folks, you are going to have to sit there and wait your turn to be called so just resign yourself to that fact, shut up, and sit quietly until you are called.  Why not bring a book to read or pick up a magazine. 

But that is not what I am thinking of here, I am only distracting myself from the issue at hand.  My son is being prepped for surgery as I write this.  That fact alone is making this waiting stuff harder to bear.  Usually I am the one on the gurney waiting to go under the knife.  In the last 26 years and 6 children we have been blessed to have only one of them have a major procedure and the rest of them have only had to have stitches for minor injuries.  With the number of boys that I have raised that is a miracle in itself.  Waiting for your child to go into the OR is a terrible thing.  When it is me I get nervous thinking about the dumbest things.  I am not afraid of pain or of dying but rather of my family being inconvenienced by me being out of comission for the time it takes for me to heal.  Am I indispensible, no.  Are they incapable of doing without me, no.  They have all been trained to function on their own.  It is a matter of my upbringing and, yes I admit it, my pride.  I dislike being taken care of.

This time it is my son.  I know too much.  Through my mind trails all of the possibilities.  It is a minor surgery but it is anesthesia, none the less.  So here I sit, praying and fretting.  O, Lord, hold him in your hand.  Guide the hand of the surgeon.  Bring him through to serve you another day.

My husband works long hours and gets home late at night most nights.  I really dislike telling him when something breaks.  But, being the obedient wife that I am, if I am asked outright if there is anything that needs fixing I'll be the first to make him a list.  Since we don't spend a lot of time in the house in the summer and I only have one carpet anyway, I don't use my vacuum an awful lot at this time of year.  It is only in the winter time when the furnace and stove are fired up that I have to vacuum every day.  So when he had a morning off this week due to the weather and he asked me if there was anything that needed fixing I immediately remembered the vacuum cleaner.  I also told him about the iron that won't heat up anymore.  That is something that is used everyday in this house, something that I cannot do without.

Out to the shop he traipsed carrying the vacuum cleaner.  An hour or so later he came in and announced that he thought he knew what was wrong but he was in need of super glue to fix it.  That made me stop and think for a minute but I found some glue and gave it to him.  (that was two days ago)  This morning he went out to look at it again and decided that his fix was not going to make that machine run properly.  I actually got to witness my husband pronouncing the old vacuum dead.

Then he came in and proceeded to take the iron apart further.  He plugged it in and placed it onto a fireplace brick that I have and tested it all over with the volt meter.  That too he pronounced dead, a bit more easily than the vacuum.

These pronouncements resulted in Matthew and I having to make a trip to Target to obtain new replacements.

Now I have a new vacuum cleaner that I hope will last a bit longer than the old one and will keep our home relatively dog-hair free and dust free.  And a new iron that will keep our clothing wrinkle free and, more importantly, aid me while I am sewing and won't leak all over the room. 

Outside my window.........the temp. is climbing and the humidity level is climbing also.  I guess we should all be used to this by now.  I am trusting the weather and hanging the laundry on the line.  Time will tell if my trust is well placed.

I am thinking........I should be downstairs cooking instead of spending time on this computer.  A friend had a baby last week and I am taking dinner to them tonight.

I am thankful for...........too many things to enumerate right now.  I need to concentrate real hard on the blessings right now because the other things keep trying to take over my brain.

From the schoolroom.........Matthew is working hard on his education.

From the kitchen.........will soon come the smells of chocolate zucchini cake, alfredo sauce, fried chicken, antipasto salad (does that have a smell?) mac and cheese for the little ones, and zucchini casserole.

I am wearing........white shorts, worn and faded blue denim sleeveless blouse, bare feet.

I am creating..........a delicious meal for a friend and her family, a new quilt for another friend who had a baby about a month ago, and a clean home for my family.

I am going.........to the chiropractor then to drop off dinner to Jen.

I am reading..........Graced and Gifted by Kimberly Hahn

I am hoping...........that it cools down this week since my floors need mopping in the worst way and it has been too muggy to do it.

I am hearing............the sound of large feet walking around downstairs, sounds like someone needs me.

Around the house.........it has been a bit too quiet since MK left for school.

One of my favorite things............curling up with a cup of coffee and a good book.

A few plans for the rest of the week.........the usual round of holy hours and errands.  I'd like to get some sewing in too.

Here is a picture thought that I am sharing with you............

I didn't take this but I love this picture of my son "sword fighting"with my sister-in-law's grandson Lane.  He can be such a man and such a boy at the same time.  I love the intense look on his face.

I don't usually play "russian roulette" with the Bible searching for a verse that the Lord supposedly intends to use to sustain me on any given day.  But today I happened to open mine and came upon this verse from Psalms and felt it appropriate to the day as I am hacking up what has settled in my lungs during the night.  (no I am not a smoker nor have I ever been.  But I have been an asthmatic for more than twenty years and I happened to have married into the wrong profession.)

Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.  Ps 55:22   I don't know how righteous I happen to be but he can have my burdens right now.  I don't spend a lot of time moaning and groaning about little things.  The daily wheezing and coughing that normally accompany my getting up in the morning have been such a part of my life that not even my children are fazed by the sound of it.  Allergies suck, to borrow a phrase from the young, and this is the height of the season around here.  Although for my body there is no low to the season.  It just seems today that it bothers me more than most days.  Perhaps because my emotions are in an uproar also.

Mary-Kate goes back to school today.  Wait, what's my problem some may ask.  After all, she is only 30 minutes away and comes home every weekend.  My problem is that the nest is getting emptier and emptier.  I am not one of those parents who had children because it seemed to be the thing to do.  Raised them waiting impatiently for the day when they leave for good and I can have my life back.  They and my husband are my life.  I am a wife and mother.  That is not only my job but my career and, more importantly, my vocation.  Anything else that I may do is only a sideline. 

So, MK is going off to school today.  No more casual talks.  No more spontaneous lunches out or going to the movies just to have a "girl day out".  No more hugs from her every night before I go to bed, smelling her newly washed hair and feeling the warmth and closeness of her.  No more listening to her spar with Matthew and knowing that it is all in fun and that they love each other as only brother and sister can. 

Yes, allergies suck, and so does letting your child go.  So this is me pinning a smile on my face and putting a lilt into my voice and making it seem, for her sake that I am thrilled for her as she embarks on the next phase of her adventure.  Thank God for husbands who are understanding without understanding.  Who will hold me in his arms tonight and let me sob my sorrow and loneliness into his shoulder.

Godspeed MK.

Outside my window.........the sun is shining and it is hot and muggy!!!!!  It seems that summer has finally arrived in Central New York.  Better late than never!!!

I am thinking.......it's a pain to type with one broken finger.

I am thankful for...........family, friends and spontaneous good times.

From the schoolroom.......there is much schoolastic gymnastics going on.  Today is the first day of the new year for Matthew.

From the kitchen........there are plenty of leftovers for lunch and I haven't a clue about supper.

I am wearing........an orange tee shirt and a denim skort with bare feet.

I am creating...........peace and order from the weekend's chaos

I am going.........to take MK's sewing student home and then stay home for the rest of the day!!!!!!!

I am reading..........Life Giving Love by Kimberly Hahn.  An excellent read!!!!!!

I am hoping.........that the other books that I ordered come before I finish the one I am reading currently.

I am hearing.........Matthew sing the Veggie Tales theme while he checks off what he just did and gets the next subject.

Around the house.........most of the cleaning is done, thank you MK, and there is peace and order so that I am free to attend to Matthew's needs.

One of my favorite things.........new paper, pencils, and crayons.  Stacks of books waiting to be read and notebooks waiting to be written in.

A few plans for the rest of the week.........appointments, holy hours, laundry, and SCHOOL!!!!!!

Here is a picture thought that I am sharing with you..........

Matthew sitting on the couch studying his Introduction to the Bible while taking copious notes.  He looks the best of students.

There is no bubble solution left in my garage.  I usually buy it by the quart and it is all gone!!!!! I looked out at the fountain this morning and saw no fountain only bubbles.  This time I think she has gone a bit too far.  What if I want to blow bubbles?  What if I want to have all my little five-year-old friends over for a bubble blowing party? 

The garden looks great from this angle doesn't it.  You can't tell that there is one whole bed that is only grass and that the pole beans have grown over the top of the trellis.  This is the time of year when there is no weeding getting done.  But, there are lots of beans in the freezer along with peas and broccoli and grated up zucchini to be made into bread, cakes, and muffins come winter.  There is also many jars of jams and jellies waiting to be opened to bless those who like that kind of stuff.  I just have to find someone around here who hasn't been hit by late blight to supply me with tomatoes so that I can fill many jars of tomatoes and sauce and soup for the coming cold months.

The hop vines are in full bloom.  I love to sit under them and smell the wonderful yeasty odor that they give off.  I have managed to propogate three new vines in the past few weeks and there looks like two more potential plants out there for next week. 

This morning was Brutus' first day of school.  He doesn't look too eager to go to his first obedience class.  Actually he is wondering why Isabella got her breakfast and he didn't get any.  By the time we got home from class I was wringing wet with sweat and he was ready for a nap.  But I think that we both learned something.   If he isn't better behaved yet he is on his way to being a better dog.  We are becoming equipped to be better citizens of the neighborhood.

Maybe next week's class will be a bit easier on at least one of us, I hope.

Outside my window........it is rainy and wet and likely to stay that way all day.  It is muggy and warmish and a perfectly rotten day to go outside.  A good day to stay in and listen to some good jazz and do a little sewing. 

I am thinking.........how nice it is to have Matthew home.  He doesn't make much noise but his presence in the house and the knowledge that he is near fills me with a certain contentment.

I am thankful for........home, family, health.  Summer days and sultry nights.  I am thankful for things that I feel in my heart that my mind knows and my words cannot express.

From the schoolroom........all is in readiness for the first day of school on Monday.

From the kitchen..........I must consult with Matthew about what he would like to have for his homecoming supper tonight.

I am wearing.........jeans and a white tee shirt.

I am creating...........canvas bags

I am going..........to the bank and post office and nowhere else today, I hope.

I am reading............Peter Kreeft's Black and White (I think that is the title)

I am hoping.........that one of the produce places around here has escaped the late blite the the rest of us are experiencing on our tomatoes.

I am hearing...........the hum of the air conditioner and the sound of MK and Matthew chatting in his room.

Around the house..........the housework is done and the laundry is progressing.  Time for me to get myself going on my sewing.

One of my favorite things..........the sounds of the music that my children make.

A few plans for the rest of the week...........The usual and not much else I hope.  I'd like to see my car get fixed so that all is back to some semblance of normal but I can wait on that too I guess.

Here is a picture thought that I am sharing with you............

Ian teaching one of Matthew's friends how to drive the tractor.  He is one of the most patient men I know when it comes to young kids.  He will make a great father some day.

I guess I should memorialize my rental car and this chapter in our history.  Here is the Toyota Camry that I am driving at present while my girl is being fixed.  Doug says that I look "hot" in it but he says I look hot in the Durango too.  I am not a car person.  I prefer trucks and SUVs.

Last evening I sat in the twilight and let myself drift away through the years.  To and fro through the memories of times gone by.  Listening to the voices of Doug, Mary-Kate, and Ian drifting across the road from the pig barn as they worked.  Contemplating the bricks laid year upon year that has built the companionable tone of their voices.  The give and take of their conversation. 

As they move from one topic to another, sharing their days, testing their ideas.  They build a history and a future together.  Their dreams merge and split yet they are never far from each other because of their common experiences and needs. 

Watching as the light fades out of the sky and seeing the pool of light in the barn I feel the warmth of their togetherness, their regard for each other.  The love that we all feel for each other encompasses us all about like the light spilling from the barn like a blessing from above.

The girls are in need of a guy again.  It is getting to be a bother to be borrowing a boar and paying the fee every time they need to be bred back.  Also it's about time that we were making the money again.  So Ian has aquired this ugly guy from a friend who is tired of feeding him.  His name is Claudius.  He is one ugly dude but he seems to be getting the job done and we already have someone lined up to take him when he is done with my girls.  Keep up the good work Claudius and you will live a long and happy life.