Down to The Wire With Seussical

The cast of Seussical the Musical are down to the last week of rehearsals for their play.  I am pleased to say that Mrs. Charmichael Knox now has her main costume.  I spent the whole day sewing on it.  (okay I know that you can see the safety pin.  I will put on fasteners and the last trim on the skirt tomorrow)  She is pictured here with a friend)

Surprised by Joy

I saw this deer the other evening when I went out to the oat field.  I can hardly believe that it was even there.  Doug was out with the culipacker (sp?) rolling through the oat field.  That thing is loud, not to mention the tractor itself.  But, there was this deer in the corner of the field next to the woods just standing there.  It stood long enough for me to stop the durango, get out, and take it's picture.  What a treat.  That is a sight that I enjoy of an evening.

Our First Hike of The Season

Sunday afternoon, while Jason was still home, we took our first trip of the season to Mount Hope for a walk.  It is a city park near here that is very scenic and has a nice hiking trail around the reservoir.  I took these pictures of this mother goose and her gostlings.  It was so peaceful by the water and there they were out for a swimming lesson.  During the spring and summer we like to go there and walk and take a lunch sometimes.  The kids have gone fishing there too.  Not much in there but sunfish and a few small blue gill.  Lots of flora and fauna though and it is close enough to go anytime you get the whim but off enough to have some woods and a short hiking trail. 

I think after this play stuff is over it is time for a trip to the Adirondacks.  This mother needs a little rest and relaxation of the wooded kind.

Early Anniversary Gift From My Beloved

For about fifteen years now I have been wearing Doug's wedding ring on a chain around my neck with my Miraculous Medal.  His ring is a liability in his line of work.  Very dangerous for a farmer to have a ring around his finger when reaching into an engine to fix it or other things that he does.  It hasn't been round since about the first year that we were married.  A few weeks ago we took it to the jewelers and they made it into a heart and suspended my medal inside it and hung it on a new chain.  It doesn't look anything like a mans wedding ring and it is truly a beautiful piece.  I truly do have a thoughtful and loving husband.

Outside my window it is finally dark and this long day is ending.

I am thankful for my family and friends but most especially for my faith in God and his protection of my sons and his loving care for all of us.

From the kitchen we enjoyed one of Jason's favorites suppers because he is leaving us tomorrow.  We had ravioli with alfredo sauce, salad and steamed broccoli.

I am wearing nice comfy, warm pajamas.  It is time for mom to go to bed.

I am creating a memory for my son to take with him to basic training so that he will hold his family in his heart when he is far away from home.

I am going to say my prayers and snuggle next to my husband and go to sleep.  (hopefully)

I am reading Wild at Heart by John Eldredge

I am hoping that tomorrow will be a little less busy and that I can get through without losing my composure.

I am hearing the phone ringing, who could be calling at this hour?

Around the house all is peaceful and quiet.  (farmers go to bed early because they rise early)

One of my favorite things is the sound of the house as it is settling down for the night and knowing that everyone is safe and well.  It is going to be hard to get used to Jason being gone after just getting used to him being home from college.

A few plans for the rest of the week:  tackle the laundry pile, finish planting the garden so that Doug doesn't have to when he comes home from work, get Mary-Kate through the play next weekend without a breakdown.

Here is a picture thought that I am sharing:

A peaceful moment between a father and his daughter.

More pictures from last nights confirmation.  Matthew with our beloved Father Morelle.  The very same priest who baptised all of my children, gave them their first communions and first penances.  He helped to prepare all of them for the sacrament of confirmation.  Doug and I are eternally greatful for all of the help he has been over the years in helping with the religious upbringing of our children.

Matthew with Father Castronovo, the pastor of St. Joseph's parish in Oneida.  Matthew serves daily mass there four or five days a week for the past two years.  He has learned a great deal from father and they have become great friends.  Matthew really looks up to father.  (only figuratively not literally as you can see from the picture)

Matthew with his friend Heidi.  He stays with her family when I have to go to the hospital for treatments on my back.  He also serves on the altar with her two brothers Zach and Josh.  He treats her just like he does his own sister so I guess he likes her in his own way.  (maybe?)  She was confirmed last night also.  We have a great bunch of young people in our parish.  It is gratifying the way that they behaved themselves and answered the Bishop when he was there last night.  They are truly the hope of the future.

Last evening, after much preparation and prayer, Matthew Joseph Thomas was confirmed and sealed with Holy Spirit.  He is now an adult member of the Catholic Church.  He is a soldier and warior for Christ. 

He is also the last of my children that I have had to prepare for the sacraments.  It was a milestone in many ways.  I stood in as proxy for his brother who is serving in Afghanistan and who he had asked to sponsor him.  It was a profound moment for me to witness as my child said a resounding "I do" to the answers of the renewal of his baptismal vows and to know that he truly means them.  It is also a heartwarming thing to witness his practice and witness of the faith every day as he attends daily Mass and goes out and lives his love for the Lord.

God bless you Matthew Joseph Thomas.

The relationship between a mother and a daughter is a very special thing.  Different even than that between, say a father and a son or a mother and a son.  There is a bond there that is forged from mutual knowing.  Knowing what each other's bodies and minds are feeling and doing.  When I was having my babys I so dreaded having a girl for this very reason.  I had never been close like this with another woman before and was clueless about how to raise a girl-child properly.  Having grown up with six brothers and one sister, a sister that I had never been particularly close to, I had a great fear that I would raise a daughter to make the mistakes that I had made and to have inside her the insecurities that I posessed.  (not a good thing).  Boys were not a mystery.  Maybe not easy but not a mystery.  Their emotions did not spill over at the slightest provocation and I could deal with that.  They like to dig in the dirt and get dirty and I can deal with that too. 

After four boys I thought that maybe I was safe but then she came along.  I'll never forget when I was carrying her and my second son wanted a sister so bad that that was all he could talk about.   At one dr's visit I took all the boys so they could hear the babys heartbeat.  The dr. had them all lined up in the examining room and hooked me up to the monitor for the big moment.  Number two son looked up at him and right out of the blue, (he had never even met the man before this moment), said " I don't like you because you never bring me sisters.  All you ever bring me is brothers."  Well, this dr. being a family man himself took it like a man and said he would do his best to bring him a sister this time. 

Five months later when his sister was born four weeks premature you can bet that my son was the happiest boy alive.  When we brought her home from the hospital and he helped me to change her diaper for the first time he changed his tune about that dr. though.  He looked shocked at the baby and said "Take the baby back she is broken"  Now you must remember that he is used to helping me change the diapers of baby boys.  He didn't know what to expect with a baby girl.  That was a teachable moment if ever there was one.  Once we got that straightened out he was happy with his sister and they have been good friends ever since. 

Now for me she has often been a joy, and a pain, a mystery and an open book.  There have been times when we have been enemies and allies against the men.  She has been my helper and my care giver.  Looking back I don't know why I was so nervous about having her.  Mind I don't think that I would take a whole bunch. (I have a friend who has seven daughters)  I know my patience level.  But I can honestly say that Mary-Kate and I are more friends than mother and daughter now and it feels good. 

When people tell me that she looks like me I am flattered beyond words because I don't ever remember being so beautiful.  She is that too.  Both beautiful inside and out.  She is truly a child of God.  Her heart if for serving God through serving her fellow man.  More times than I can count she has responded to others with a tenderness and thoughtfulness that is beautiful to behold.  She is a true reflection of what budding Catholic womanhood should be.  She isn't perfect by any means and she isn't done yet, but who is.  But she is well on the way to being the flower that God wants her to be.  When He harvests her and brings her home to His garden in heaven he will be pleased and proud to add her to his lovely bouquet there.

I love you Mary-Katherine and am proud of you.

One year ago yesterday Mary-Kate underwent majoy back surgery to repair a poorly healed fractured back.  Then she spent the bulk of the summer in a back brace.  It was a long and often frustrating recovery.  For a formerly active teenager it was difficult to restrict herself to the enforced inactivity.  But she did with surprising good grace.  She submitted to being taken care of by her family.

Now by the grace of God look at all of the things that she can do.  She has healed and her back is as strong as ever.  We have celebrated with a special day and many prayers of thanksgiving offered up to God for healing our girl and especially for giving all of us the new found insight into what it is like to be disabled in the way that MK was for that short time.  May we always sympathsize and give our help and prayers to others.  Thank you God for giving our MK to us whole to continue to grow in wisdom, age and grace before You.

Last Sunday we were out in the fields walking.  Ian needed to measure out ten acres so that he could start plowing this week.  I came across this clump of wood violets.  It made me start thinking and remembering.  These are my favorite flowers.  A little difficult for a suitor to go to a florist and order a dozen of for his lady love.  But when Doug and I were first married and he was out in the field making fence he would take the time to carefully pick a small bunch and bring it home to me at lunch time each day during the spring while they lasted.  They are very delicate and don't last long once they have been picked.  Like new and young love which is also delicate and does not last long unless it is tended to and cared for.

Now, I don't often take picture of people from behind but I was observing each of my children and how they walked and comparing their walks to their aspirations in life.  Ian is a farmer and always has been.  Since he was a little boy and could express his wishes to us he has been a farmer and he has not flagged in that goal.  He has that ground covering lope of the farmer when he walks too.  He swings his arms and takes long steps and covers ground quickly and efficiently just like his father. 

Now Matthew just kind of ambles along thoughtfully.  He walks like an intellectual.  He hasn't said what he wants yet but it is definitely not farming.  Mary-Kate has a nice easy considered walk.  She aspires to being a veterinarian.  Vets have to be able to think on their feet.  All the vets that I know are very thoughtful and considering people.  They are slow and plodding (in the best sense of the word).  So is Mary-Kate.

Anyway we walked  out through the plowed ground out to the pond to see how things were out there.  Matthew opened up a plugged tile and we looked at the blueberry plants that we put in a few weeks ago.  In a couple of years we will have blueberries on our own farm.  Doug and I were scouting out a place to build our house.  It is looking more and more like we are going to be building a house for ourselves and Ian will be having the home farm. 

That will be a major adjustment to hand over our home of twenty five years to our son and move into a new home.  It will also be a major adventure. We shall see.  Everyone here is waiting on Doug to make the final decision.

No, sorry Ian, I didn't find your pager.  Although I have been praying to St. Anthony since you lost it.  No, I found the only existing picture of the balcony in its heyday.  I knew  that I had a picture of it.  So I went through the box of pictures and then I went through the scrapbooks that I have been working on and there it was on a scrapbook page.  Not bad for a bunch of little kids. 

And there is my beloved with three of his sons on the end of that rope.  I'm not quite sure what they are doing although they could probably tell me if they were here.  They have a tendancy to remember those kinds of details.  And there is our old dog Baby in the background.  She passed away a few years ago.  She was very ill and Matthew was very upset when she finally died.  Now all can see why we immortalize that structure so much.  Today it is a pile of scrap just waiting for the right moment to set afire.

This is apparantly the door to the jail part of their destroyed balcony.  When the kids were little Matthew was able to crawl out of the window and "escape" from jail.  While we were cleaning up the mess he decided to see if he could still climb through the window before we knocked the door apart to load it onto the tractor. 

Now, since they really stoppe using the balcony for a fort Matthew has grown about twelve inches taller and gained about fifty pounds.  But he is still just a tall skinny kid and is able to crawl through the window of the jail and escape.

Then Mary-Kate, of course, had to try.  Now she is tall and slim.  I won't say skinny.  Although she isn't as curvy as some girls her age and she lost a lot of weight when she had her surgery.  But she had to try.  Her father and I warned her that girls are shaped differently than boys are and that that window was a little on the small side.  But she wasn't having any of it.  So she got down there on the ground and started to crawl into that hole.

She got her shoulders in and then she got her waist in and she twisted and she turned and she talked all the way about how it wasn't a tight fit.

But she only got as far as her hips and then she realized that it wasn't going to work so she had to go back.  You can see by this last picture how very small that hole is.  There was no way my girl was going to squeeze her girl self into that hole.  Her dad could have probably done it but not her.  Then they knocked the door apart and threw the pieces onto the tractor and said good-bye to the door to the jail from the balcony.

No more jail breaks.  Then we went in to say our prayers and go to bed.  Monday we will finish cleaning up and we will have a bonfire and say a final farewell to the balcony of their youth.  I think that I will even miss the mess and the disappearance of things.  I always knew where tools were and kids were.  I still hear the ringing of hammers and the sound of high pitched voices coming from that corner of the yard some days.  It is the ghosts of small boys dreaming dreams and having high adventures on warm summer days.

When my boys were young they picked out one corner of our yard that over hung a ravine next to it and started to build what they later named "the balcony".  This was their fort.  Now most kids would just knock together something maybe in a few days of in a week at the most.  You know how attention spans are at very young ages.  Well not my boys.  This building frenzy lasted for years.  They built and built and remodeled and rebuilt and then they tore everything down and then they built it back up again.  At one point this thing was two stories high.  They had a drawbridge and had dug a "moat" (without water in it of coarse).  They had their own what they refered to as their safes that they kept their treasures in.  They had a watchout tower in the top too.

Then they grew up and it was time for them to out grow the whole concept of a fort.  So a few years ago Matthew started to tear the whole thing down.  Now the whole thing is demolished but the pile of rotten lumber is still sitting there and we have decided that it is time to clean up the mess.  So tonight Matthew and Mary-Kate and I started the clean-up.  I wish that I had a picture of the balcony intact on the computer to show what it looked like in its heyday.  It was quite the adventurous place for boys to play.  (and girls too!!)