Tuesday morning, early, Matthew, Mary-Kate and I left to travel to Kentucky for Jason’s graduation.  Now, anyone who knows me knows that I don’t like to drive but if I have to I like to make the most of a situation.  I thought that since we were making this trip we would see some of the country along our way.  First stop Niagara Fall.

We stopped and parked in Niagara Falls and started to walk around.  When we got to the falls the kids were sufficiently impressed by the wonder of God’s creation.  They truly are a glorious sight.

We bought tickets to go on the Maid of the Mist boat tour.  Unfortunately, Mary-Kate didn’t want to go on the boat. (sea sickness!!!! she get sick from seeing too much)  So Matthew and I went.  The falls were even more beautiful from down below.

Then we walked by the Hard Rock Cafe and I had to get a picture.  We even went inside so they could say that they too had been in a Hard Rock Cafe.

We are now in Kentucky and the first thing that we had to see was the Patton Museum in Fort Knox.  A very powerful place to be.  We looked at the tanks outside and inside and read about the history of the armored portion of the United States Army.

Today is graduation and then we will decide what to see next.  The adventure continues.

I’m sitting here on the balcony of the hotel while a thunder storm rages around me.  My daughter and son sleep soundly and safely in the room behind.  I couldn’t sleep and have been reflecting on why I am here in this place.  What possessed me to pack up the car and drive over 750 miles when I don’t like to drive down the street at home.

Before I left my husband said frequently that I didn’t have to do this.  He came up with many good reasons why I could stay home and why my son should understand my not coming to his graduation.  But, still, I felt compelled to leave home and travel this distance.  My husband trys to understand but I don’t think he can.  Most men lead with their heads and intellects and not with their hearts.  Now, I’m not advocating a switch for men.  I love my husbands analytical brain and I’m truly fascinated with the way that he reasons things out.  It is a power that I often lack or forget to use.  But I am convicted that this is a time for the heart and not the head.

My son, my fourth son, is graduation today from basic training.  My son who, for some reason, requires so much more from me than the others.  My son who is quite capable, whether intentionally or not, of making me feel guilty for not being here for him.  My son who takes and takes but finds it difficult to give, seemingly, unless there is something in it for him.  Do I sound hard?  It is not meant to be that way.  I love this son, with all my heart and unconditionally.  He holds a place inside of me that none of the others do.  He causes in me emotions that the others don’t.  Guilt, that maybe I dropped the ball when raising him.  Fear that he will come to some kind of terrible end because of his head strong ways and heedlessness.  Doubt that I somehow didn’t convey to him all that I should have.  I look at the others and feel none of these things.  They are not perfect but they give me assurance through the way that they live and act that they are seeking the right path for their lives.  I know that I can’t live their lives for them, and I wouldn’t try, but I can help them along the way to salvation.  That is all I desire for all of my children.  That they seek the will of God for their lives and try their best to follow His will.

So, here I am in Radcliff, Kentucky.  Miles from home and husband.  My God and the armour of my faith are all that I have to sustain and protect me.  Protect me from what you may ask.  I fear nothing that can hurt my body.  I live in pain daily and so anything that could hurt me is not to be feared.  Anything that could kill me would be welcome on my worst days.  No, that is not what I fear but what is in my mind.  So I pray and pray and pray more.  And He gives me peace that I am doing the right thing.  That the pain and doubts that I offer back to Him are acceptable gifts.  And this assurance from my Lord brings me peace. 

Oh, Lord, hold my son in your hand.  Open his mind and heart to your promptings and your teachings.  Enlighten him to your path and will and give him the grace necessary to follow you.  That is my prayer for him.

Direct, O Lord, all our actions by thy holy inspirations and further us by thy continual graces.  That every prayer and work my begin from thee and by thee be happily ended.  That is my prayer for myself.

On a lighter note, this trip is being enjoyed by Matthew and Mary-Kate.  They visited with my brother Tom Tuesday night and had a great time.  I love this brother of mine.  He reminds me very much of our father and that is a good thing for my father is a good man.  Today they slept in the car from Ohio and when we got here we visited the Patton Museum in Ft. Knox.  Matthew was in his element around all that army gear and camouflage.  When we came out of the museum we saw seven men jump from an airplane and glide gracefully to the earth.  What a glorious sight.  The icing on the cake was seeing an airplane skim the treetops and then come to a landing on post. 

Friday we will go back to Ohio and spend another night with my brother.  His wife and daughters will be back then too so we can enjoy their company.  Then Saturday we will head back to New York.  I pray that this whole trip will help my son to understand that I do truly love him inspite of the perception that I am so hard on him.  I am hard on him because I do love him and want him to become the man that God wants him to be, no less.

Now it’s time to try to sleep so I can look fresh for the ceremony and have the strength for the day ahead.

Don’t for get to stop by Peggy’s, http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com , for all the links entered in this week’s Simple Womans Daybook.

Outside my window:  it is 72 already and muggy.  But the sun is shining and there is a light breeze, good for drying my laundry.

I’m thinking;  there is a lot to do before we leave tomorrow for Kentucky.  Why am I sitting at the computer?

I am thankful for:  the lovely visit that we had with Adam.  I am sorry to see him go but proud of the man that he has become.

From the kitchen:  the dishwasher is running and I have to begin preparing food for my hubby to have while Mary-Kate, Matthew and I are gone this week.

I’m creating:  order from the chaos of the weekend and a plan for packing and leaving in the morning.

I’m reading:  nothing right now, don’t have time.  I finished the three I was reading and have to find something new to delve into.

I am hoping:  that the trip goes well and that we find Jason a happy and contented young man with the decisions that he has made for his life.

I’m hearing:  both washers (got to get ALL the laundry today before we leave)  Matthew cleaning up his room and Mary-Kate getting her part of the housework done.

Around the house:  cleaning, cooking, and packing.  Maybe we will get to swimming lessons this afternoon too.

One of my favorite things:  the weekend that we just spent together.  Even though Adam had to leave we were happy together and didn’t dwell on his having to go.

A few plans for the rest of the week:  after today, driving to Kentucky to see Jason graduate, spending some time with my children seeing part of this great country of ours.  Getting home safely.

Here is a picture thought that I am sharing with you:

The lovely hot air balloon that frequently lands around here.  What a glorious sight and something that I would dearly love to do.

Just an update on the goings on around here.  Mary-Kate and I have been sewing up a storm trying to produce some inventory for a possible  we based business.  Now we are just novices at this whole business thing and worse than novices at the whole web thing.  But we thought that it might be worth a try to showcase our talents online and see what transpires.  Nothing ventured noting gained as they say.

So if you all want to get a gander at what is for sale just go to http://RebekahandMaryKatesplace.blogspot.com .  If you are brave enough to want to buy just add a comment and we will go from there.  Thank you.

Yesterday was just like any Friday.  We went to morning Mass.  We worked at home for awhile then went off to run errands and go to Holy Hour.  While I was out Adam called me, returning a message I had left on his phone.  I asked if I could call him back about 3:30. 

When we got home and I walked into the house there was Adam in my livingroom.  But he’s supposed to be in Norfolk!!!!  Unknown to us he had gotten leave and so he jumped into his car and drove home to visit us.  What a wonderful surprise.  Now we have the pleasure of his company for the next eight days.  It brightens my day to have him home with us for awhile. 

I came across this meditation about a month ago and said that I would post it sometime.  St. Augustine is one of my favorites, because he was a serious sinner and he knew it.  But when the chips were down he gave up his sinful life and worked hard for the kingdom of God.  He was also honest about his sinfulness and his struggle to be holy.  Anyway here it is.

You mustn’t regard fasting as an unimportant or superfluous matter.  Please don’t think to yourself when perhaps you are fasting because it is the Church’s custom, don’t say to yourself, or listen to the suggestions of the tempter inside you saying, “What are you doing, you and your fasting?   You’re cheating your soul, you’re not giving it what it takes delight in.  You’re inflicting punishment on yourself, you have turned into your own torturer and executioner.  So does your torturing yourself please God?  That means he’s cruel, if he enjoys your being punished.”

Answer this sort of tempter like this:   “Yes, I do hurt myself, so that he may spare me; I do impose my own punishment on myself, so that he may come to my assistance, that I may please his eyes, that I may charm his goodness.  I mean, the victim too is hurt, in order to be laid on the altar.  In this way my flesh will exert less pressure on my mind.”  And to someone of this sort trying to dissuade you with bad arguments, reply with this comparison:   “Suppose you were going to ride a horse, and it looked as if it might throw you with its friskiness, wouldn’t you make sure of having a safe journey, by cutting the rations of the unruly beast, and taming it  with hunger, since you couldn’t curb it with the reins?  My flesh is my mount.  On my journey to Jerusalem it frequently runs away with me, and tries to make me lose my way, and my way is Christ; so as it plays up like that, shouldn’t I restrain it with fasting?”

Saint Augustine

This meditation really struck me and made me wonder if I don’t fast enough to control my flesh.  Would it make it easier to dwell on Christ and his teachings and promptings.  I have a new tool in my arsenal against Satan.

 Don’t forget to stop by Peggys,  http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/, for all the links entered in this week’s Simple Woman’s Daybook

Outside my window……  the sun is shining and a light breeze is blowing.  It’s shaping up to be a beautiful day.  Perfect for hanging the laundry.

I’m thinking….  the is quite a bit to do this week (when isn’t there)

I’m thankful for…… the beautiful day that we had together yesterday visiting Auriesville, NY and the Shrine of the North American Martyrs and kayacking on Great Sacandaga Lake.  I am also thankful for my beautiful daughter and all of her helpfulness and consideration of others.

From the kitchen……  leftovers from yesterdays picnic.  Maybe scalloped potatoes and ham for supper

I’m creating…… a clean and orderly workspace in my office area, and getting paperwork done at the same time.  I promised that I wouldn’t sew until my desk was visible and the paperwork was well underway

I’m going…… to give the car the day off

I’m wearing….. a yellow tank top and tan capris

I’m reading….. Nuts and Bolts by Tim Staples

I’m hoping…… to be able to get some school shopping done this week for MK and to finish up some sewing projects.

I’m hearing….. the sounds of the fans running.  MK is in her room resting from her swimming lesson and Matthew is on the couch asleep (he has a headache from swimming)

Around the house…. it smells like pine-sol and swiffer because we gave it all a thorough cleaning this morning

One of my favorite things…… happened yesterday, I talked to three of my sons who are away and my daughter talked to the other  (what a treat to know they are all right and thinking about us)

A few plans for the rest of the week…… mow the lawn, take the dog to the vet, get the rest of the gardens weeded (before it turns hot and muggy again) sew, sew, sew (I hope)

A picture thought to share with you……

What a great day we had all together yesterday. I don’t usually post pictures of myself but this one gives me good feelings and memories of kayacking on the lake yesterday and watching my husband get into the water (he usually doesn’t). 

Outside My Window:  The sun is shining brightly.  It is 88 out and getting very muggy.  The air is perfumed with freshly mown hay.

I Am Thinking:  It is very quiet around here since my son left.  How can one quiet person make such a big impact on life around here?

I Am Thankful For:  The love of my family.  For too warm days that keep me indoors so I can get some work done inside.

From The Kitchen:  Nothing is happening there.  There is quiet and order since lunch is over and all is cleaned up.

I’m Creating:  Sewing and sewing to have items to sell when my website gets up and running.

I’m Going:  into the pool when I get some more done in here.  Hopefully nowhere else in the car today. 

I’m Wearing:  a denim skort, orange tank top, and flip flops

I’m Reading:  Passion for Purity (can’t think of the author)  I have to prepare a presentation of purity and modesty for the young girls group at church. 

I’m Hoping;  that Matthew and I get all the hay baled before it rains this evening

I’m Hearing:  Mary-Kate at the sewing machine making baby quilts for sale.

Around the House:  everything is quiet and clean.  (we worked hard to clean before the humidity got too bad)

One of My Favorite Things:  Having my daughter near.  I’m drinking in the time with her before she has to leave for college.

A Few Plans For The Rest of The Week:  sewing, scrapbooking with the neighbors girls, more sewing, making hay

Here Is A Picture Thought I Am Sharing With You:

My wonderful husband at work milking the cows.  It takes a big man to do this job on such a hot and muggy day.  He milks day in and day out to support us and never complains.  Thanks be to God for the good man that he is.

The world is not safe.  Matthew has a blog site now.  It has become a family rule that he can only explain his scenarios on Thursdays simply because he would do it everyday and all day.  But there is no such rule on Xanga.  So the whole world is going to be subject to his ramblings.